As I have embarked on my healing journey, I noticed a pattern that seemed to be
a consistent marker that would throw roadblocks in my way. I felt a sense of
loneliness each time I revisited the memory that pained me. One of the things
that I can remember as a young child was my parents relentlessly fighting. I
cannot recall any time where either parent made the effort to check on or
reassure me when our family structure was crumbling under the weight of my
parent’s unhealed traumas. As those traumas were played out, they did not seem
to have the capacity to nurture because of being stuck in survival mode
themselves. With that, my formative years are where I first experienced a
breaking of the interpersonal bridge within my family unit.
In an interview explaining trauma, Bessel van der Kolk (author of The Body
Keeps the Score) stated that: “One of the largest mitigating factors against getting
traumatized is who is there for you at that particular time.” This statement is
indicative of our inherent need for relationships as we navigate the deeply painful
parts of our lives. When trauma is experienced as a result of neglect, mental,
emotional, sexual, or physical abuse, a bond is broken down in the existing
relationship. Every survivor of human trafficking that I have encountered has
endured every form of abuse listed. Many times those abuses have been
perpetrated by those closest to them and by more than one person. Imagine what
their experience with interpersonal relationships has looked like for them; a trail
of broken bonds over the course of their lives.
So what is the antidote that will counteract these broken bonds? Healthy and
healing relationships with others. What does this practically look like?
Spirit Led, Trauma-Informed Care: Providing Holy Spirit led
Trauma-Informed Care for survivors is an aspect of care for survivors that recognizes the impact of trauma on survivors' lives and relationships is essential. Trauma-informed care is not healing in a vacuum, this approach does place an emphasis on safety, trustworthiness, choice, collaboration, and empowerment, which are all good. All of these aspects can be implemented, but without the Holy Spirit leading, it is easy to check the proverbial boxes and miss what and where God is wanting to lead in the healing process.
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